Aim to be a "Good Enough" Parent

The amazing British Psychoanalysis Donald Winnicott coined and theorized the important concept, the "good enough" parent. He saw that parents had high expectations on themselves as a parent, and also their child, and created many anxieties about their abilities as parents, which all led to maladaptive thinking and behavior. The idea of the "good enough" parent gives parents space to accept that they will not be perfect, because no one is, and their faults and deficits as parents will not be the collapse of their child, that is, if they at least try to be "good enough," or supportive, affectionate, understanding, and loving towards their child. The aim is to be a good enough parent to help raise a good enough child and adult.

If you can try to be responsible, patient, curious, emotionally and physically present, and give devotional love and affection, you'll most likely be fine. (Easier said than done).

Yet, sometimes even aiming to be "good enough" can be hard if you've never had a model, or your own parent was not "good enough," but actually detrimental to your development. What to do then? This will be explored on the next blog post.

No Nest